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R. I. P.

Journal Entry: Sun May 16, 2010, 3:15 PM

Ronny James Dio.
May you find that Rainbow in the Dark.

  • Listening to: Dio - Holy Diver (Album)
  • Listening to: KIEw - Los(t) Alamos
  • Reading: Roger Zelazny - The Amber Chronicles
Life's pretty... Fast and loose these days. University is nearly killing me, even though there is success. There was a lot of drama lately. Most of which I would LOVE to forget. Stupid, kindergarten-level type of drek.

There was a pretty serious event that quite shocked me, a few months ago. It feels even further away now.

Right now I'm sick and tired and still can't sleep.

So I bought myself a month of subscription.

And wanted to shout out my account:

If anyone of you would like to connect there, I'd be more than pleased. :)
Looong time, no journal.
And no new material, for that matter.
Let's see if the muse will shine down on me now, in this new year of mine... :)

Anyways, here's one of those weird emails that one gets from time to time. Edited for being in English and getting rid of the most outreagous questions. If you want to know stupid things about me... Read on. :)

If not, well...
Watch my scraps in the next few days. I might want to test something 'new'.

Here goes.

01. [What time is it?]
2000 CET

02. [Full name?]
Matthäus Igor Cebulla

03. [Nicknames?]
Sarge, Matt, Weirdo... If you've got one more for me, please share. *smiles*

04. [Birthday?]
01.04.1983 (Or, for Americans: 04.01.1983 ;) )

05. [Birthplace?]
Ratibor; Poland

06. [Colour of trousers you're wearing right nowt?]
Black as night; modular cargo-pants.

07. [Current favourite song?]
b-movie - Remembrance Day

08. [What are you listening to right now?]
Pain of Salvation - Imago (Homines Partus)

09. [Why do women give their cars names?]
I wouldn't know. Actually, I'm the only one who gave his car a name in my dircle of friends. And I'm not a woman. (AFAIK... *grins*)

10. [Last thing you ate?]
Fried egg, sunnyside up.

11. [Favourite animal?]
Wolf. Through the chance of having met a wild one once. After that, it developed. I also like wolvish characteristics (and seem to have a few of them myself. Which ones? Well, not everyone finds out... *wolvish grin*)

12. [If you were a crayon, which color would you be?]
Either black or dark blue. Can't really say why. Just a gut feeling-

13. [Where do you want to go for honeymoon?]
Copenhagen during the summer months. Strolling through the city. Visiting the sea-side. Driving somewhere further north for a day or two... I think that this would be... Quite lovely.

14. [How's the weather right now?]
Cloudy with a few hints of spring. God... I sooo hope for spring.

15. [Last person you talked to on the phone?]
Err... Good question, actually.

16. [What do you notice first on your preferred gender?]
Still the same old, strange, thing: Her neck. Quickly followed by her face (especially the eyes) and hair(-colour).

17. [How are you today?]
Fine, actually. :) Visiting a good friend tomorrow. Expecting mail from someone... Special. *smiles* A lovely dark angel. :)

18. [Favourite non-alcoholic beverage?]
Earl Grey.

19. [Favourite alcoholic beverage?]
Mmmh... Sapphire Blue Gin and Tonic.

20. [Are you pierced?]
Nope, sorry.

21. [Do you sport a tattoo?]
Not yet, sorry.

22. [How do you eat a Hanuta (An Oreo, for non-Germans)?]
Straight edge, baby! Bite for bite without any fancy tactics.

23. [Favourite sport to watch?]
Icehockey. NHL (When they're not striking. *grins*)

24. [What will be the next CD that you'll buy?]
Hmm... If nothing else comes out before it, I think that it'll be the next Blind Guardian album. (Yeah, well... I like them. So what? *g*)

25. [Eye colour?]

26. [Do you wear contacts?]
Nope. I'm waaaaaay to sensitive about my eyeballs to touch them with ANYTHING... *shudders*

27. [Siblings and age?]
One sister. 21.

28. [Last movie you watched?]
51st State.

29. [Favourite day in the year?]
Errr... Do I have one? I don't know...

30. [Are you too shy to invite someone to dinner?]
No. No, really not. I'm way past these stages of shyness.

31. [Ever had a car-crash?]
Just two stupid parking-accidents. *grumbles*

32. [What do you like more, funny or scary movies?]
GOOD movies. ;) On my own I prefer funny movies. With other people scary movies are really fun.

33. [Your favourite movie?]
Oi. Errr... Wow. Good question.
"Le Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain" is pretty much up there... :)

34. [Favourite vacation-target?]
Denmark. Copenhagen.

35. [Summer or winter?]
Well... Summer. I like the cold, but I HATE German winters. *grumbles*

36. [Hugs or kisses?]
A combination of both, with the right person. Not every kiss has to be sexual. But both hugs and kisses should always be full of emotions.

37. [Relationship or ONS?]
Relationships. Even IF there should be a ONS, it should have emotions attached to it, and be with someone you like and trust. No throwaway-sex.

38. [Do you ever loved someone strong enough that s/he made you cry?]
Naturally, yes. If you ever loved someone and he/she didn't make you cry, it didn't last long enough.

39. [Where do you want to be kissed somewhen in the future?]
A bustling city at night. Under the full moon. By someone who finally loves me.

40. [Favourite fast-food place?]
Subway. It just wins. Hands down.

41. [Favourite book?]
Neil Gaiman - American Gods.
But I'm reading Anansi Boys now, and this one's a true killer too. :)

42. [Favourite disco/bar/club/dancehall?]
Hmmmm... Saint / Oberhausen. Memories.

43. [How often did you fail your dirver's license test?]
Not once. :)

44. [How/Where do you see yourself in 10 years?]
Hopefully somewhere else. With a job I like and which will challange me. I don't have a clear picture, though.

45. [Who send you the last email you received?]

46. [Did you ever get busted for a crime you committed?]
A few speeding tickets, yeah.

47. [Anti-boredom strategies?]
Reading. Listening to music.

48. [What phases are typical for you?]
Positive outlook with certain flights of light depression.

49. [Which friend lives the furthest away?]
Must be the Alaskans... :)

50. [What's the worst that could happen to YOU?]
Losing my eyesight.

51. [Your time-to-go-to-bed time?]
2am, mostly. Often later. Seldom earlier.

52. [What's the best in your life right now?]
Patchy. *obscure reference*

53. [Chocolate or vanilla?]

54. [how much do your love your job?]
As much as it pays me... Not very fond of it, but it has to be.

55. [In which store would you max your account?]
HMV. Hands down.
Barnes and Nobles too, perhaps.

56. [What time is it now?]
2146 CET. Damn, I got distracted... *g*
I got a free week of subscription today. :-)

dA really feels different now.
And damn... Wouldn't it be nice to always look at it like that?

. . .

On another note:

Only slightly more than 24hrs and I'll be in a train...
I'm happy. :)
  • Listening to: Wir sind Helden - Darf ich Das behalten
  • Reading: Neal Stephenson - Cryptonomicon
Soooo... There're Tue, Wed and Thu to go.
Roughly three days.

Three days to prepare some small gifts for someone really,
really wonderful. :)

And three days I cannot wait to pass now... *argh*
Well, that will give me more focus on the things I want to

Let me tell you, that dA is a great place.

And that I would like to profoundly thank the "random Deviant"
feature, and the people who coded it. Thanks guys and gals.
A big, hearty, thank you. *smiles*

Life's good. And will get even better Friday.

Hope you don't mind me... :)
I'm just sayin'. *wanders off into the shadow with a smile on his face*
News: 24.10.2oo4
Some spelling corrected. Some new situations in life thrown in for good measure. And generally... More me. :)

Stole this from biancamarou

[ name ] Matthäus I. Cebulla
[ nicknames ] Sarge, 'Spinner' (German)
[ date of birth ] 01 04 1983 (That's the 1st of April for you Yanks *g*. ... Yes. I know.)
[ weight ] Somewhere around 77-80 kilos
[ astrological sign? ] Aries
[ location ] Gelsenkirchen. Rhine-Ruhr area in Germany. You know 'Die Krupps'? They like the style here, too. *grins*
[ marital status ] Single. Not happy 'bout it. Not at all...
[ eye colour ] Brown
[ height ] Umm... 1.72m. Or something like this.
[ parents still together? ] Yepp.
[ siblings? ] hikaru-,  my little sis.
[ nieces/nephews? ] Technically no. But there seem to be two very cute girls in Denmark who call me Uncle. I'm damn proud because of this. :-)
[ kids of your own? ] No. Good for the non-existant kids, too.
[ pets? ] No. And glad of it. Not my style/The pet would die. ;)
[ education? ] I'm at Uni right now.
[ rent, lease, or own your home? ] I'm renting from my parents right now. *grumbles*
[ have any credit cards? ] Nope. And I'm glad about this, most of the time.
[ what do you drive? ] The Corsa of Death. (Opel Corsa)

[ colour ] Black
[ number ] 23 & 42
[ animal ] Wolf
[ flower ] Rose
[ scent ] Patchouli which is already set in clothes for a few days. You know... When you take that jacket out, and it has this smell on it and your memories start to fire off... *smiles*
[ drinks ] Coke. Ginger Ale. Mead. Gin Tonic.
[ book ] Phew... So many. But Neil Gaiman's 'American Gods' is one of the most liked ones.
[ food ] Japanese, Chinese, Mexican and Junk.

Do you...
[ colour your hair ] I had them black once. I am a natural brown-head. I plan to make them black again in the following weeks.
[ have tattoos ] Sadly, no. But I've got ideas.
[ piercing ] Nope. But ideas, too.
[ cheat on tests/homework ] I did a few times. Not very proud of it, but as I failed this tests nonetheless, there was nothing lost. It was one particular subject with one particular teacher. *grumbles* I hate this guy still.
[ drink/smoke ] I drink very sparsely. I never smoke directly. But I'm often an indirect smoker. And I used to kiss a girl who smokes...
[ like roller coasters ] Only the really fast ones. It's hard to get me excited these days.
[ wish you could live somewhere else ] From time to time. But as I try to be as much of myself as possible, that's very seldom.
[ like cleaning ] No. Not for me. I only do it when I'm not able to live properly in my room anymore. But if I help others out, I like it. Perheps because it's something I do for friends then. I often put more energy into such things.
[ write in cursive or print ] Print. My cursive isn't readable.
[ swear a lot ] Only in jest. Not when I'm angry. Then I just get silent.
[ own a web cam ] Nope. Sorry.
[ know how to drive ] Hey, I'm alive, ain't I? I try to not bring others in danger. And I do this quite well.
[ diet ] No. But I should. Still... Too lazy.
[ own a cell phone ] Yeah. Don't use it often.
[ ever get off the damn computer ] When I'm not at home. And even then I manage to check my mails from time to time. *grins*
[ habla espanol ] No, sorry. Just a few basic words.

Have you ever...
[ been arrested ] Only brought home once. Funny story. *g*
[ been in a fist fight ] No. I only subdued someone once. It was neccessary.
[ kicked someone in the nuts ] No.
[ stolen anything ] No.
[ held a gun ] Yeah. I'm relatively good with rifles. Although it was an old German Wehrmacht rifle. Perhaps I'm better with newer models. ;-)
[ considered being a hooker ] Heh... Most certainly not.
[ cried over a girl ] Cynics would call this a hobby of mine... :-/
[ cried over a boy ] No.
[ lied to someone ] Sadly... Yes. I regret it still.
[ been in love ] Been there... Still am.
[ fallen for your best friend ] No. Although it did turn out the other way once. The girl I was in love with became one of my best friends. And it will hopefully happen again.
[ made out with JUST a friend ] No.
[ been rejected ] Nobody's perfect, eh? :-(
[ used someone ] Have not. Do not. Will not.
[ been used ] My first GF. Yeah. After this? No. I tend to watch out for this.
[ been kissed ] Yes. *smiles* It was always wonderfull...

[ current mood ] Mixed. Sad. Thoughtfull...
[ current music ] Rotersand - Merging Oceans
[ current taste ] A slight aftertaste of Coke.
[ current hair ] To the shoulders, brown, mostly in a tight knot.
[ current annoyance ] Being how I am. Not having done some things 'the right way' in the recent past...
[ current smell ] The smells coming out of the kitchen.
[ current thing I ought to be doing ] Studying. Will start. Soon.
[ current windows open? ] Mail client, devArt
[ current desktop picture ] Blue 'Eye in the Pyramid' from SJGames
[ current crush ] Right now I'm trying to stop a crush. It's... Weird.